


Distance

by orphan_account, Paperadventures



Series: Tethered [5]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Dorkness, Drama, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Minor Character Death, Mutual Pining, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Past Relationship(s), Post-Break Up, Romance, Slow Burn, Swearing, Texting, and linctavia too, but clexa is endgame, kind of?, ranya, theres some flarke here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-26
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-27 04:18:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9962435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paperadventures/pseuds/Paperadventures
Summary: ‘Hey, it’s me.’Clarke barely catches the phone that almost slips from her hand.‘It’s, uh, Lexa. I’m here.’Or;Two years is a long fucking time. That's how long ago Lexa had left Polis and everyone that mattered to her to pursue her new job in another country.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, Lexark here. Yes, this is yet another fanfic written by PaperAd and I. Yes, we will be uptading the other ones soon, and yes, we are back bitches. Sorry for the longass hiatus, by the way. We have no excuses.
> 
> As always, kudos and comments are welcomed. Let us know what you think.

 

_“Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry; You don't know how lovely you are. I had to find you, tell you I need you, tell you I set you apart.” – Coldplay_

  


* * *

 

Two years is a long fucking time.

Two years of people to meet, and new books to read, and music to listen to. Two years of working a new job, facing new struggles, and slowly changing to adjust to them. Two years of becoming a new person and yet still holding onto some things like no time has passed at all. Two years ago and a month. That's how long ago Lexa had left Polis and everyone that mattered to her to pursue her new job in environmental science.

She had traveled all over the world researching animal species and climate change, trying to come up with solutions to help in restoring endangered species and it had been the time of her life, but now after so long of constant motion, she just wants to settle down somewhere for a while, and that is why she now finds herself sitting alone in a hotel with her tiny suitcase back where everything and everyone she left is still buzzing on around her like nothing has changed, even though in her heart she knows that so much has.

She has on her big glasses and a comfy sweater while she sits on the bed cross-legged with her phone in her hand. Her parents have known she was coming for a few weeks now but at the moment they are out of town, so she's stuck here by herself. It's late. Not horribly, but the sun is starting to set so it is probably 8pm or so. She's exhausted from her traveling, but there is something she needs to do that has been nagging her for months since she decided that she would be coming home. Calling Clarke.

Before she left, Clarke Griffin and her had dated for three years. It started off as something that was casual and just for fun, but as their feelings deepened, so did the intimacy and seriousness in their relationship. She had been telling herself for weeks that she was going to call the woman before she arrived, but now the time has passed and she's just nervously gazing at her phone.

Leaving behind her girlfriend was by far the most difficult choice that came with leaving, but at the time it had been what was right for her and so she had done it without looking back. They said their emotional goodbyes but after that Lexa became so busy with work, and talking only made both of them hurt, so she had decided that trying to move on was the best idea and as time went by their contact cut off.

Now though, as Lexa gazes down at her contact for Clarke, she wonders if the woman even still has the same number. She wonders if her voice sounds the same and if her laugh is still raspy. She wonders if she's even still in Polis.

Her heart beats wildly and she needs to find out so she presses the call button and holds the phone up to her ear. It rings and she doesn't know if she should be relieved or mortified. A familiar voice picks up and she doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. She waits probably ten seconds before she manages to get out any words, but even then her voice sounds a little shaky.

“Hey, it's me.” She swallows hard when she realizes that probably isn't enough. It's been fucking two years. “It's, uh, Lexa. I'm here.”

 

\--

 

 _‘Hey, it’s me._ ’

Clarke barely catches the phone that almost slips from her hand.

She’s heard about the feeling of time freezing. When everything slows down and you simply. can’t. move.  When your senses are heightened and you can hear your heartbeat thumping on your ears and the goosebumps raising in the back of your neck.

Her breath gets caught on her throat and for a second it feels like she was punched hard on her stomach. She sits up.

It’s _terrifying_.

She blinks. One, two, three times. And for a second there she wants to scoff and tell Raven to cut the shit out and stop messing with her because that’s definitely _not_ funny, but –,

 _But_ . That voice. That tone. Soft, quivery, unsure yet firm, is too familiar. Too _right_. And something inside Clarke breaks all over again.

Soon she is back to her dorm at the University, five years ago. She is back at being a med student, full of loans to pay and a messy busy schedule where she had 3 jobs and voluntary work and everything was so full of life and laughter and joy – despite how hard she had to fight everyday just to pay for her education;

She is back at bumping into this new girl at the hall full of people, dropping her books like a fucking rom-com cliché and blushing furiously under the gaze of sharp, beautiful green eyes. And shit, Clarke rarely blushes.

‘ _It’s, uh, Lexa. I’m here.’_

Clarke clears her throat and closes her eyes as she tilts her head back against the headboard of the bed – The bed that she is now sharing with Finn.

“Ah,” She replies as her mind goes blank. Finn rolls over in his sleep, throwing his arm over her stomach and she bites her lip hard. “Lexa,” Her tongue flicks on the roof of her mouth and she tastes the woman’s name in her mouth again. “Hi.”

Fluttering her clear blue eyes open, Clarke’s mind is suddenly filled with all kind of memories. Some good, some special, some… Not so much. Swallowing hard, she pushes Finn’s arm away carefully not to wake him up before standing up silently and waking barefoot to the kitchen with her heart beating wildly against her ribcage. She runs her fingers through her messy blonde hair, trying to tame it now that its long and needing of a cut before pouring herself some water.

“What do you need?” She asks, but despite the words, her voice is soft and gentle. Curious even. It’s just that they haven’t spoken in too long, that she half expects some sort of bad news.

The blonde sits down on the island, elbows over the marble and eyes on the window, fixed on the dark sky and the full bright moon that illuminates part of the room as she listens to the in and out of her ex-girlfriend’s soft breath.

 

Lexa swallows hard on the other end and when she hears her name coming off of the woman’s lips, her heart feels like it might fucking explode in her chest. It has been so long since that day where they had left each other and yet the familiarity is enough to throw her back.

“I'm…” Lexa's voice trails off when she hears Clarke question and she seems to panic slightly because fuck, she has no idea what she needs. “I’m here.” She repeats stupidly and stays quiet for a second like she's expecting the woman to just drop everything and come at those two words. “I mean here in Polis. I'm in a downtown hotel and I just arrived a few minutes ago and my parents are out of town and you're just the first person I thought of.”

Lexa rubs her forehead because she feels so stupid and doesn't even really know what to say. “I just… I meant to call you earlier to let you know I would be coming but I never really knew how to do it.”

She feels her heart beating wildly and she doesn't realize how emotional she is from hearing Clarke's voice until she realizes her hand in her lap trembles slightly.

When she had first left, they had both known that it would be better for the both of them to cut off completely so they never had spoken about what would happen if she came back at all.

“I don't know, I'm sorry I must sound so stupid.” She rambles and let's out a deep sigh. “And it's late, I'm sorry it's late.” Lexa murmurs and chews the inside of her cheek. “I guess I just want to go get coffee or something? I don't know.”

 

The corner of Clarke’s mouth turns up when Lexa starts babbling. She can easily imagine the girl in one of her comfortable clothes, sitting nervously on the bed, or standing up by the large window of some big fancy hotel room; blushing, biting on her lips or chewing at her cheeks. Probably fidgeting with something too.

It’s a nice vivid image and Clarke has to look down for a moment. It’s too much but nothing at all at the same time. It feels like a tornado coming in her direction while she is stuck in her place and her legs can’t seem to move.

_She doesn’t want them to._

Running her fingers through her hair in an old nervous tick, Clarke sighs and shakes her head slowly as the tiny smile makes home on her lips. She drags her the tip of her middle finger over the glass still filled with water and thinks it over.

Part of her wants to drop everything. To run to her, just like that. Barefoot, with a small pink short and a large orange worn out t-shirt barely covering her shoulders and chest.

The other part is more experienced and knows too well how to control her teenager impulses.

Still, she glances at the clock by the wall. 8:27PM. Her stomach churns loudly and yes, okay, a coffee actually does sounds good. It’s not too late for that.

 _Maybe it is_ , the back of her mind replies and she closes her eyes.

“I…” Her voice breaks and she clears her throat as she pinches the bridge of her nose at her lost of words. “It’s fine, Lex,” She says softly, the nickname slipping without a second thought. “Coffee sounds good.”

 

\--

 

Lexa feels like she's not making any sense and a part of her is afraid that Clarke is just going to laugh at her and brush off this whole thing, but before her fears can elevate, the blonde is agreeing.

“Now?” She swallows hard and runs her fingers through her messy hair before pulling her phone away from her ear so that she can check the time on it. It's 8:30. She's inviting her ex girlfriend that she hasn't spoken to in two years out for coffee at 8:30 pm.

Before she really even gives the blonde time to answer, she's shaking her head and deciding that two years is long enough to wait so now that she's here again and Clarke is willing, fuck what's normal, they will go out for coffee together right now. Her jet lag is killing her, but the prospect of seeing this girl she hasn't spoken to in so long is thrilling so her smile.

“Where do you wanna meet?” She speaks up and let's out a deep breath she didn't realize she had been holding.

Her green eyes gaze up at the ceiling and she then remembers the cute little shop they used to visit all the time before she left.

“What about at Mugs Coffee?” She speaks up the name of the café and fiddles with her hair. It's only about a half hour drive from her and it should be ever closer for Clarke.

She looks like a mess with her long hair falls messily around her shoulders and no makeup on her face while she wears her baggy clothing. She remembers how beautiful Clarke always used to look like this, and how every morning she would always say she liked her best with her tired smile and old teeshirt.

The memory makes her ache.

 

\--

 

“Um –” Clarke feels her cheeks heating up and she knows she is _somehow_ blushing at her presumption that Lexa was talking about meeting now. She doesn’t have the time to apologize, though, because a second later the woman is bringing back old memories at mentioning the little shop they used to go years ago.

It was actually the place of their first date and she has to bite her lip again, harder this time, and look up to the ceiling because of the rush of emotions that runs through her at that thought. Once she has it in control, Clarke sighs and shakes her head before remembering that Lexa can’t actually see her.

“It’s closed,” She says with a sad smile. “They sold it out last year. Now it’s some shoes shop, I guess. Haven’t been in that area in a long time.”

Wetting her lips with the tip of her tongue, Clarke fidgets a little with the hem of her shirt as the silence hovers between them for a moment, sobering them up a bit as the notion of time hits them both at the same time.

She clears her throat and runs her fingers through her hair one more time before gulping her water down and placing the glass in the sink. “Joe’s is still running, though?” She says after awhile, leaning her hip against the counter and running her fingertips over her lips. “I mean…” She sighs loudly this time, frustrated with herself as she leans her back on the fridge and slips down to sit on the floor.

“How crazy is this?” She whispers before biting on her lip and hugging her legs against her front.

Her heart beats madly in her chest and she can feel the guilty creeping up as the back of her mind remembers her about Finn.

“Yeah I guess this is pretty crazy.” She speaks up and just lets out a quiet sigh. “I know things are different now, I guess I just don't have anyone else here right now and I want to see you. I want to know about everything.”

She wants to know what new music Clarke has been listening to and if she still goes to lay and gaze at the stars at night. She wants to know if the woman has a good job now, or found an apartment that she really likes. She has so many questions a she feels like she should know the answers already.

“Joe’s is fine though.” She points out and tries to make her voice sound less weary than it is. “That's like a 20 minute drive from my hotel, I think. Want to meet there at like, 9?” All she really needs to do is put on shoes and a pair of jeans then she can leave, and God, she really wants to.

She's nervous as though she expects the blonde to start yelling at her for leaving or something, but the harsh words never come, just the familiar breathing on the other end of the phone that makes her chest fill with warmth.

“It's good to hear your voice again.” She says the words before she can think any better of it and feels her face flush with embarrassment. “I've got so much to tell you about.”

Like a moment ago, Clarke nods before clearing her throat and replying with a quiet ‘yes’.

She worries her lip between her teeth as she imagines how Lexa must look like now after two years. _Beautiful_ , probably. Her cheeks flushes again and she rolls her eyes at herself, the guilt still making her stomach churn in discomfort.

But. She is not doing anything wrong. She is going out to meet a… Friend. That’s all. In the middle of the night, but, still. Nothing wrong.

It took her almost the full two years to actually move on, though. To actually heal from the hurt that it was Lexa leaving her and their plans behind to chase a better future. She never blamed the girl. She got mad at herself, instead. For not doing more, fighting more. At the universe, for not giving them a chance.

She never expected Lexa to come back, though.

“I will be there,” She says as she stands up, ignoring the way her body reacts at listening to the girl’s voice. “See you in a few, Lex.” Her tone is gently and almost breathily, and she hesitates a few seconds before finishing the call.

Clarke leans against the island and closes her eyes, letting out a long sigh and taking a deep breath. _She can do it_.

It takes her a few minutes to go back to her room, change into a tight black jeans, a blue t-shirt and her favorite black leather jacket. She glances at Finn, who is still sleeping through the storm she is facing and she can’t help but to run her fingers through his hair gently.

He is a nice guy, really. Never pushing, never asking for more. Understanding. Knowing she has her limits and that she is still trying to get on her feet after her last relationship.

After pulling her boots on, combing her hair and putting some light make up, Clarke grabs her keys and wallet and steps out of her apartment to make her way ( _back_ ) to Lexa.

 

\--

 

Lexa is in a rush as soon as Clarke hangs up the phone because _holy fuck_ this is happening right now. This girl that she hasn't seen in years yet she somehow remembers everything about is going to be next to her again after all this time.

She swallows hard and jumps up, leaving on her baggy sweater but ditching her sweatpants for some ripped up boyfriend jeans. She doesn't really have time to do her makeup but she picks up a comb and runs her fingers through her hair, letting it fall in long waves down her shoulders and back. It's grown out over the two years so it's longer and waiver.

She hasn't styled it differently, but the way it frames her face has shifted just slightly. She has new freckles on her cheeks and chest and her smile is more confident now. They are subtle differences but they are things people close to her would notice.

After gazing at herself for one more moment, she grabs her phone and wallet so that she can catch a taxi since she can't pick up the car she's renting for another day.

The chilly breeze nips at her nose and cheeks, turning them a shade of light pink as she stands on the side of the road for a couple of minutes before lifting her hand up when she notices an empty can coming down the side of the road. The woman driving pulls over and she climbs into the back of the car. Luckily the driver knows the way to the coffee shop so she doesn't have to look up the address.

The ride is short and she just sits there tapping her fingers nervously and gazing out the window. She just wants to be there already. She wants to see Clarke.

When the woman finally pulls over near the familiar little shop, Lexa thanks her and pays her without bothering to wait for the change before she hops out of the car and walks quickly into the shop. By this hour it's pretty much empty except for a few customers scattered about working quietly on their laptops or having a late snack.

The brunette swallows hard when she doesn't notice Clarke there yet but she just makes her way over to a little corner booth in the back where they will have some privacy.

It almost seems fake that she's about to see this person again. The same girl that she has a hundred pictures of in her phone is about to be standing in front of her. She remembers how many times she tried to delete that album full of the photos of them. Some of them are stupid pictures she took of the girl when she wasn't paying attention, and others are selfies of them together or pictures their friends had taken of them. Some are more private.

She swallows hard and runs her fingers through her hair, allowing the waitress to take her order of just a tea, deciding that if Clarke and her want to get something to eat, they can order once she arrives.

So she sits. She just sits and waits and when her tea arrives she just holds the mug and taps her fingers on it with her eyes trained down on it and her hair tucked behind her ear.


End file.
